Fairygodmuma's Blog

Sprinkle some magic in your life…

Where there is dark… there is light

“Stars can’t shine without darkness”

This is somewhat of a controversial conversation and one that most find difficult to comprehend, but one which I have strong views on that I’d like to share with you lovely lot.

It’s the concept that good can be found in every heartache, tragedy, disaster or crisis. That light can be found in even the darkest of situations.

This is where most people turn their noses up and look at me like I have three heads. But I truly believe it.

As part of my qualification to become a life coach, I had to keep a journal for two weeks of all the positive things that happened to me. During this time, I was pregnant, developed a condition which could harm myself and my baby, was hospitalised, unable to keep any food down and went into very early premature labour. It was a scary time for all involved. However, I was able to look at the whole situation and find the positives.

I had been overdoing it at work despite having a high risk pregnancy, and had lost sight of how important it was to take it easy and put my baby and myself first. This scare left me signed off for the rest of my pregnancy, which gave me the rest I needed to focus on keeping myself and my baby healthy. Prior to this occurence, I had not been eating healthily and had been completely over eating, however this forced me to eat healthier and in smaller quantities. I was so overwhelmed with the care and hard work of the nurses and medical practitioners who looked after my baby and I. I felt utterly blessed to be fortunate enough to have access to free medical healthcare and medication necessary. I got weighted on hand and foot and felt so looked after.

What could have been a miserable, negative and disheartening experience was the complete opposite. Don’t get me wrong, there were still anxieties, but I made the conscious choice to focus on the good, rather than the bad. My diary of positive experiences was fuller than ever on the days I was in hospital.

This is just one basic example of where light can be found in a dark situation.

However, I have come across people who have been diagnosed with terminal illnesses or have lost someone they love. How on Earth could you possibly find the positive in their situations…?

I could.

Everything that happens to us holds a blessing of acceptance, happiness, self awareness, lessons, inspiration, appreciation, understanding, peace, love.

When someone dies, we can focus on the fact they are no longer in our life, or we can focus on all the joy they bought us, the lessons they taught us and how we are going to honour their name and keep them alive in our hearts and minds. When faced with illness, focus on the parts of you that are healthy and well, and the fact that you are alive, here and now. If the illness is terminal, find gratitude for the reminder that time is precious and should be lived to the maximum.

Ultimately, we will all die. You could get taken out by a bus tomorrow, pass away following a sustained illness or die in your sleep at a grand old age. But one thing is certain, our bodies will die. You can spend your life fretting about how or when you may die, or you can live each day of your life with passion and gratitude for the opportunities they bring. A large percentage of us spend our lives existing, rather than living and it takes a tragedy to occur for us to realise this and make positive change. Why can we not live each day like it were our last without these tragedies? When someone is dying or dies, although it may not be apparent at the time, there is untold amounts of positivity to be taken from their passing. Starting with how blessed you were to have shared their life with them and for all they have taught you about your life.

This is not to say we wont feel grief or heartache. We are human and it is important to welcome, acknowledge and express emotions. However, it is your choice as to whether you allow yourself to dwell in the darkness of negative emotions, or whether you choose to move forward and into the light.

For the next two weeks, keep a diary of everything that happens to you. For every negative experience, find some positive outcomes too. I guarantee you will be pleasantly surprised…

I will finish on one of my favourite sayings of all time from one of my favourite book/films:

“Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light” – Albus Dumbledore

Love and blessings

Fairy GodMuma xxx